Growing Griffins

We will make it official.... Dennis and I are expecting! I hear all the time that we shouldn't be telling people yet, but honestly its a little to exciting to keep in, and if anything happens I would rather have a support system, than have to tell everyone after and expect them to be there for me. I'm only announcing it on my blog for now, waiting a little longer for the world of FB! If you read my blog, then you get to hear the news first! :)
So let me fill you in! Almost 3 weeks ago I saw this:

I got very excited, but very nervous at the same time! We prayed and prayed that this time would be different. The next day I went in to get my HCG levels checked and then again 48 hours later, and they doubled! That is exactly what they were supposed to be doing. So then we figured it was good to at least tell people. We slowly started telling friends when we saw them, hearing all the congratulations was amazing! Finally got to tell our moms on Mothers Day :)
2 weeks later  (fast forward to this week) we went in for our first appointment. I already knew things were different this time, I woke up Monday morning and threw up for the first time, and I wish I could say last time, but nope, every morning since then! Our midwife said that because of our Ectopic past we can go in for an urgent ultrasound (typically you wouldn't get your first ultrasound til around 8 weeks, I was only at 6 weeks). I jumped at the chance to see if little peanut was in the right place!
Tuesday afternoon Dennis and I rushed down for our ultrasound appointment, as I had a few with the last one, the ultrasound wasn't so new, but the possibility of actually seeing something this time was exciting! It didn't take the tech long before she stopped on my uterus and for the first time it wasn't empty! I could see something at the top, by the not concerned look on her face, I figured that was a good sign. Then she moved to a little better view and I could see the flickering light! I knew what that meant, tears started rolling down my face as I asked, is that the heartbeat? She said yes, it is beating very strong and looks very healthy! It took Dennis a little longer to figure out what we were looking at, but when he did, I saw a smile come over his face that just warmed my heart!

When the tech asked if we wanted a picture printed out, I couldn't even open my mouth before Dennis jumped up and yes, of course we do! So here is the picture of our little peanut (although Dennis calls him our Crumb Cruncher!). The big black dead space is my uterus, and the round circle in the upper part is the babies sack (what feeds him before the placenta is formed), attached to the sack is this little rice looking thing, that is our baby!!!!
I know that things are different then last time, I know that at least our little one made it in the right place, but I'm still trying to shove out the negative thoughts that something can still go wrong. But of course it can at anytime with anyone. I will just try and enjoy what I can.
Talking about enjoying it.... I thought when I got pregnant it would be this wonderful miracle. It is a miracle, but its not as amazing yet as I had imagined. I remember after we lost our first, the thought of a pregnant woman complaining saddened me. I always thought if only I was pregnant, I would take all those bad things and just be happy. I'm happy please don't get me wrong, but I'm having a hard time. Every symptom I could get, I am getting. TMI-  my nipples are extremely sensitive, just the thought of a touch makes them ache in pain. Exhaustion has set in so deep I find myself dosing off at work. If that wasn't bad enough, every morning I wake up, I have diarrhea and vomit before I can even let the dog out. About 75% of the rest of the day I am on the verge of puking, lots of dry heaving and headaches. Very bloated, gassy, and feeling stretching in my tummy. But I'm loving it. Because I know with every horrible symptom its just a little reminder of the reality that I have a little one growing inside my belly.
Please continue to pray for our Growing Griffin. He is estimated to arrive on or around January 9th (the doctor just changed our due date).