I started my list of gifts.. it was harder than I had expected.. not quite sure why, I think I have been over thinking it. I will think of something and than think that stupid and not write it down, but I'm pretty sure I will need that stupid gift, love or something that I'm thankful for to fill my 1000!
I'm going to blog them 20 at a time, so here is the 1st set of 20!
1. mmmm, the sound from Dennis after a home cooked meal
2. Watching the waves lap the side of our boat
3. Great conversations with friends
4. Feelings, love, empathy, contentment, happiness and mercy
5. The burn of the sun
6. The feeling of freedom after you jump in the water
7. The smile from Dennis from across the room
8. Sand on your feet
9. The waves of the ocean rush over your feet
10. Watching Burton run and play
11. Dennis captaining our boat
12. Smell of fresh ground coffee
13. Chapstick
14. Loosing track of time
15. Leaving my cell behind
16. Reading a book
17. Paying bills
18. Organizing
19. Taking a hot shower
20. Gizmo's cry of love
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Eucharisteo
Eucharisteo; what does it mean to you? I'm sure you just googled it. If you did you may have found this:
Eucharisteo–Greek. yoo-khar-is-teh’-o. Verb. Definition: 1.To be grateful, to feel thankful. 2. Give thanks
The root word of eucharisteo is charis, meaning grace.
So now let me ask that same question, What does Eucharisteo mean to you? I have been reading Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts, Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are. I have been reading is an understatement, its probably been a few months, which isn't like me with a book, but it has taken me a while to finish it, its the first book I have read on my kindle, sometimes I forget about it. I can't say go get it read it, its the best book ever, it took me a long time to even enjoy it, I felt like for a while there I was forcing myself to read it. But I almost think that was the point, because now I get it, I understand the point, it makes me think. That's what is supposed to happen! :)
So I've decided I'm going to do the challenge that she takes on in the book. Write down 1,000 things that you are thankful for. It may sound easy or stupid, but I can see the progress that this challenge took her. Starting with vague things, like people or places, to specific creations of God's moment.
The other book I'm reading Contraian's Guide to Knowing God-Spirituality for the Rest of Us talks about how at growth groups we go to make friends and meet people, but the point of them is to feel connected with each other and with God. I see that being the end point of this challenge, to feel more connected with the things we are grateful for and the reason we have them.
I want to stop thinking negative and have a little faith. I don't want to follow the spirit, I want the spirit in me to guide me. Thats what I'm seeking. So lets see how it goes, I will try and put up a report, since I know I'm not so good at blogging. I have all intentions, but than I forget! :)
Let's see how it goes.........
Eucharisteo–Greek. yoo-khar-is-teh’-o. Verb. Definition: 1.To be grateful, to feel thankful. 2. Give thanks
The root word of eucharisteo is charis, meaning grace.
So now let me ask that same question, What does Eucharisteo mean to you? I have been reading Ann Voskamp's One Thousand Gifts, Dare to Live Fully Right Where You Are. I have been reading is an understatement, its probably been a few months, which isn't like me with a book, but it has taken me a while to finish it, its the first book I have read on my kindle, sometimes I forget about it. I can't say go get it read it, its the best book ever, it took me a long time to even enjoy it, I felt like for a while there I was forcing myself to read it. But I almost think that was the point, because now I get it, I understand the point, it makes me think. That's what is supposed to happen! :)
So I've decided I'm going to do the challenge that she takes on in the book. Write down 1,000 things that you are thankful for. It may sound easy or stupid, but I can see the progress that this challenge took her. Starting with vague things, like people or places, to specific creations of God's moment.
The other book I'm reading Contraian's Guide to Knowing God-Spirituality for the Rest of Us talks about how at growth groups we go to make friends and meet people, but the point of them is to feel connected with each other and with God. I see that being the end point of this challenge, to feel more connected with the things we are grateful for and the reason we have them.
I want to stop thinking negative and have a little faith. I don't want to follow the spirit, I want the spirit in me to guide me. Thats what I'm seeking. So lets see how it goes, I will try and put up a report, since I know I'm not so good at blogging. I have all intentions, but than I forget! :)
Let's see how it goes.........
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
What now:
We were asked to write a little bit about our Uganda Mission for the HCCP newsletter, normally I would jump at the opportunity to talk about our trip, but I didn't really know what to say. Wow, I was at a loss for words!! hahah
I have a hard time putting to paper what I feel/felt about our trip. I still have a hard time even going back to "normal" life. I feel like Uganda is still calling for me, like I left something behind that I just can't wait to return to. But I know that I also have a life here that I need to attend to. That I have to be "responsible" for now, and can't just run off on another mission so soon.
I was just reading Eastlake's Mission Blog and read this today:
we are all missionaries, it just depends on what your mission is.
For some people, their mission is being an excellent mom. Or curing cancer. Or teaching children well. Or being an honest businessman. Or leading people towards health. Or having an influential marriage.
You are a missionary for whatever it is that you are passionate about. You don’t have to travel to Africa to be on a mission. You just have to be willing to tell people about what you love.
But you can travel to Africa, or anywhere else for that matter, if you want :)
Wow, that hit me, that was meant for me, that was written for me! hahaha
Now time to continue to be a missionary, continue to serve God, and continue to find my passion.
The biggest thing that I found while in Uganda was peace, peace with my life, peace in my mind, and peace and love in my marriage. It gave me a strong desire to continue to be a better person, to give more than I take, and to keep smiling, even when I'm having a bad day, cause its truly never that bad.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Give more than you take..
Give more than you take... what exactly does that mean to you? Does that mean give when it feels right? Give when you get some recognition? Give when it fits in your schedule, your comfort zone?
That isn't what it is supposed to mean, but seems to be the way we take it.
I have heard this statement over and over, but have I lived it? Not really. I'm trying to decide what it means for me, what changes I need to make in my life to make this statement real.
I'm sure most people think that I'm a busy body, always have something that I'm doing, some party I'm throwing, some cause I'm hot on for the moment, or some way I'm trying to get people to donate for something. But I feel that if you think I'm doing too much, or trying to do too much, you probably aren't doing enough!
How can you live your life to its fullest and still feel like you gave back? Enjoy life but help others? This is going to be different for everyone. For some they just want to write a check and forget about it, one amount every month and they feel good. Some want to donate their time instead of money. Others want to donate everything they have and still not think its enough. Are any of those wrong? Not in my eyes, because you have to start somewhere, we can't all expect to be in the same place to give, have the time, the money and the willingness.
How about we just start with willingness, dreams, and passion and see where that takes us. I have been searching for my purpose in life for a while now. Trying to find your passion first, that will end up driving your purpose. Sometimes we look right over it. So be busy, try to help more, but in everything you do, stop and think about what it is, how it makes you feel and if you want to do more.
Don't be afraid to question what your doing, make changes that lead to your purpose, don't try and make your purpose change to fit your life. Let God lead it, he has a divine plan for our lives, we just have to figure out what that is and do it!
That isn't what it is supposed to mean, but seems to be the way we take it.
I have heard this statement over and over, but have I lived it? Not really. I'm trying to decide what it means for me, what changes I need to make in my life to make this statement real.
I'm sure most people think that I'm a busy body, always have something that I'm doing, some party I'm throwing, some cause I'm hot on for the moment, or some way I'm trying to get people to donate for something. But I feel that if you think I'm doing too much, or trying to do too much, you probably aren't doing enough!
How can you live your life to its fullest and still feel like you gave back? Enjoy life but help others? This is going to be different for everyone. For some they just want to write a check and forget about it, one amount every month and they feel good. Some want to donate their time instead of money. Others want to donate everything they have and still not think its enough. Are any of those wrong? Not in my eyes, because you have to start somewhere, we can't all expect to be in the same place to give, have the time, the money and the willingness.
How about we just start with willingness, dreams, and passion and see where that takes us. I have been searching for my purpose in life for a while now. Trying to find your passion first, that will end up driving your purpose. Sometimes we look right over it. So be busy, try to help more, but in everything you do, stop and think about what it is, how it makes you feel and if you want to do more.
Don't be afraid to question what your doing, make changes that lead to your purpose, don't try and make your purpose change to fit your life. Let God lead it, he has a divine plan for our lives, we just have to figure out what that is and do it!
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Reality hit
While planning our journey to Uganda, I tried to prepare myself for what I thought I would see, feel and experience. Don't know why I even tried, I was not prepared for how I would handle it all when we got back. Going there was unreal, it was a whirlwind of things to do, places to be and faces to see. Sad that some of those faces are starting to fade from my memory, they were popping up every night before bed. After 3 weeks I knew that would start to change.
When we arrived back at home I was exhausted, as I didn't want to sleep I unpacked our stinky bags and started on what turned out to be half a dozen loads of laundry! Unfortunately Dennis feel asleep right away. I decided to go through all the photos of our trip, as soon as the videos started the tears began to fall. Our friends Matt and Karen came by, we relived the whole thing, oh the excitement of finally sharing our stories with someone else.
Thinking I had the jetlag under control I fell asleep to wake up normal and feeling great Sunday morning... or so I thought. This is when what I thought I was prepared for hit me like a brick! During church I began to get really antsy in one place, I couldn't sit still, my mind kept wandering and I caught myself forgetting where I was. Once the service ended we were eager to talk with our friends and catch up in the lobby. So excited to finally see Ashleigh's ring (Jason's new fiance) and hear about wedding planning, she said she was heading out for dress shopping, I wanted to be a part of that, I love anything to do with weddings, but than realizing what that would entail; not having a chance to go back home to see my dog for hours, and not having a chance to do what I wanted (nothing) on the first day back after 11 days with 16 people in a very structured environment. I broke down, I don't remember the last time I had that sort of a mental breakdown, I was crying, screaming, and freaking out in our car on our way to lunch to make the decision to go our not. Poor Dennis I don't know how he puts up with most of the time! Doesn't sound like that big of a deal right? Correct, but to an emotional wreck that had more culture shock going back to her own country than going to a third world one without her common neccessistites, it was the hardest decision of my moment! I wanted to go, to be a part of her big planning day, support her and Jason, see the dresses and be there for her, but I couldn't, I was so distraught about "having" to do something that I didn't want to do anything. So thats what I did, I cried myself back to the house and I went to the couch, cried some more than prayed than cried than slept for half the day!
That was how my week began...
After going back to "normal" life, starting work and seeing family, I had this itching feeling to simplify my life. Seeing the children with torn clothes, no shoes, no clean drinking water, but big smiles on their faces, brought peace throughout my heart. For the first time I felt contentment in my life. I have not been happy with somethings, mostly our condo, I have felt trapped, (can't sell, can't rent, can't expand) I kept thinking it was going to hold us back from our future, my feelings on that have changed. Whatever God throws at us, and decides is in our future we can do it, we can take it on, and some how make it work and figure it out.
We re figured our finances for what we had to work with, we decided where our priorities are. I instantly wanted to head back to Uganda, back to those children's arms, I wanted to be their for them, be their "Auntie" as they like to call us. I can't, not never, just not now. It took some coming to terms with this but I decided that for now I am going to find a way to help them locally.
I would love to focus my efforts and gifts on people and needs that I am passionate about. I can spread myself so thin trying to help everyone and everything that I can't fully help even one thing, or I can decide where my passion is and jump in that pool and just start treading water until I can see myself moving through the changes. So I'm still trying to figure out how and when, but I think I have a small grasp of what the plan might be.
I'm still continuing to pray and see where my spiritual gifts are best to be used and to make a goal and purpose for my future and our future. I think my next step is to make a goal board, a little cheesy, but may help out!
The other thing that hit me when we returned that never even crossed my mind, was how attatched I got to our travel family. For the length and condtions we were traveling in, I couldn't believe how awesome everyone got along. When we got home and it was time to see family and friends, I couldn't stop thinking of the family that we created along the way, the memories we all shared, the experiences that others would never fully understand and the feelings that we all had for each other. Not only did I get to embark on a journey of a lifetime, and be part of a change, I met new people, touched the lives of children, but most of all got my heart changed for ever! I hope these feelings never go away.
When we arrived back at home I was exhausted, as I didn't want to sleep I unpacked our stinky bags and started on what turned out to be half a dozen loads of laundry! Unfortunately Dennis feel asleep right away. I decided to go through all the photos of our trip, as soon as the videos started the tears began to fall. Our friends Matt and Karen came by, we relived the whole thing, oh the excitement of finally sharing our stories with someone else.
Thinking I had the jetlag under control I fell asleep to wake up normal and feeling great Sunday morning... or so I thought. This is when what I thought I was prepared for hit me like a brick! During church I began to get really antsy in one place, I couldn't sit still, my mind kept wandering and I caught myself forgetting where I was. Once the service ended we were eager to talk with our friends and catch up in the lobby. So excited to finally see Ashleigh's ring (Jason's new fiance) and hear about wedding planning, she said she was heading out for dress shopping, I wanted to be a part of that, I love anything to do with weddings, but than realizing what that would entail; not having a chance to go back home to see my dog for hours, and not having a chance to do what I wanted (nothing) on the first day back after 11 days with 16 people in a very structured environment. I broke down, I don't remember the last time I had that sort of a mental breakdown, I was crying, screaming, and freaking out in our car on our way to lunch to make the decision to go our not. Poor Dennis I don't know how he puts up with most of the time! Doesn't sound like that big of a deal right? Correct, but to an emotional wreck that had more culture shock going back to her own country than going to a third world one without her common neccessistites, it was the hardest decision of my moment! I wanted to go, to be a part of her big planning day, support her and Jason, see the dresses and be there for her, but I couldn't, I was so distraught about "having" to do something that I didn't want to do anything. So thats what I did, I cried myself back to the house and I went to the couch, cried some more than prayed than cried than slept for half the day!
That was how my week began...
After going back to "normal" life, starting work and seeing family, I had this itching feeling to simplify my life. Seeing the children with torn clothes, no shoes, no clean drinking water, but big smiles on their faces, brought peace throughout my heart. For the first time I felt contentment in my life. I have not been happy with somethings, mostly our condo, I have felt trapped, (can't sell, can't rent, can't expand) I kept thinking it was going to hold us back from our future, my feelings on that have changed. Whatever God throws at us, and decides is in our future we can do it, we can take it on, and some how make it work and figure it out.
We re figured our finances for what we had to work with, we decided where our priorities are. I instantly wanted to head back to Uganda, back to those children's arms, I wanted to be their for them, be their "Auntie" as they like to call us. I can't, not never, just not now. It took some coming to terms with this but I decided that for now I am going to find a way to help them locally.
I would love to focus my efforts and gifts on people and needs that I am passionate about. I can spread myself so thin trying to help everyone and everything that I can't fully help even one thing, or I can decide where my passion is and jump in that pool and just start treading water until I can see myself moving through the changes. So I'm still trying to figure out how and when, but I think I have a small grasp of what the plan might be.
I'm still continuing to pray and see where my spiritual gifts are best to be used and to make a goal and purpose for my future and our future. I think my next step is to make a goal board, a little cheesy, but may help out!
The other thing that hit me when we returned that never even crossed my mind, was how attatched I got to our travel family. For the length and condtions we were traveling in, I couldn't believe how awesome everyone got along. When we got home and it was time to see family and friends, I couldn't stop thinking of the family that we created along the way, the memories we all shared, the experiences that others would never fully understand and the feelings that we all had for each other. Not only did I get to embark on a journey of a lifetime, and be part of a change, I met new people, touched the lives of children, but most of all got my heart changed for ever! I hope these feelings never go away.
I guess I will just start!
Why start a blog? Well I know I sort of already put that on my last post, but I didn't really answer the question for myself.
I started my first blog before we left for Europe last year, really just so I had one place for friends and family to see how we were doing while we were gone, as not everyone has Facebook. After a pause in blogging, i picked it back up when we decided to do a mission to Uganda. What an amazing experience that was, and I was loving journaling and blogging before we left and when we got back. I decided to keep my travel blog: griffintravels.blogspot.com for just that the travel blog. Since I enjoyed my first blogging experience I made the decision to start another for my random rants and to just talk to no one :)
So here I begin.. no day like the present right?
I haven't really decided if anyone will even read this, we will see :)
I started my first blog before we left for Europe last year, really just so I had one place for friends and family to see how we were doing while we were gone, as not everyone has Facebook. After a pause in blogging, i picked it back up when we decided to do a mission to Uganda. What an amazing experience that was, and I was loving journaling and blogging before we left and when we got back. I decided to keep my travel blog: griffintravels.blogspot.com for just that the travel blog. Since I enjoyed my first blogging experience I made the decision to start another for my random rants and to just talk to no one :)
So here I begin.. no day like the present right?
I haven't really decided if anyone will even read this, we will see :)
Monday, January 31, 2011
Why Not?
I decided to start another blog, since my other one: griffintravels.blogspot.com is for when we travel, I wanted one for just random thoughts that come to me.
Not sure if anyone will even read this, but maybe it can just be my sounding board too :)
I like to talk to one in particular most of the time anyways.. so check back soon!
Not sure if anyone will even read this, but maybe it can just be my sounding board too :)
I like to talk to one in particular most of the time anyways.. so check back soon!
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